For quite sometime in my life, I was feeling highly despondent at the back of a set of complex fears like
Fear of being sidelined, Fear of being neglected
Fear of being humiliated
Fear of being criticized, Fear of being looked down upon etc..
which kept on haunting me day and night, to overcome which I equally had to invent many instant solutions by keeping myself ever armored with certain intense defense strategies like
Being careful in all my dealings, constantly projecting myself on my achievements
forever keeping update my knowledge bank,
being ever conscious of all discrete criticisms, developing methods of cutting down all pointing out talks etc..
and thus was living a half-hearted life until a day, I got the message of
Sloka 62 and 63, Chapter 2 of Srimad Bhagavad Gita
deep in my heart which forever asserts saying..
'dhyayato visayan pumsah sangas tesupajayate
sangat sanjayate kamah kamat krodho bhijayate
krodhad bhavati sammohah sammohat smrti vibhramah
smrti bhramsad buddhi naso buddhi nasat pranasyati!'
'By brooding over sense objects (involving in self gratification), attachment develops, from attachment desires come up, from desires (when not satisfied) anger comes up,
from anger delusion occurs, from delusion bewilderment of memory takes place, after that discrimination capacity goes and losing discrimination one perishes!'
As I simultaneously started searching for a solution for the same, I equally happened to remember
Sloka 9 of Bhajagovindam
in respect of truthful living which forever asserts..
'sastangatve nissangatvam, nissangatve nirmohatvam
nirmohatve nischalatatvam,nischalatatve jeevanmuktih'
'From the company of seekers of truth (Living thru' awareness) non attachment develops, from non attachment comes freedom from delusion, from the freedom from delusion develops self steadiness and that self steadiness (alone) leads (one) to true liberation!'
With such a discipline, attitude and related 'Right' doing in my living, I could keep off the feeling of despondency generated in me due to these fears thereby finding partly a true meaning to my life!